Tag: Work

Lead by Example

My wife is a businesswoman and she works very hard.  She sometimes wonders why I put so much time into having fun.  As most of you know, I still play baseball at a pretty high level.  I am in a Wednesday night bowling league.  I play poker.  Not only that, but I coach baseball for work.  I also like to be involved in many social events with friends and family.  I am spontaneous.  I was just out to lunch for a friend’s birthday, and another friend asked if I wanted to come over and sing songs while he played the piano.  I did, and it was fun.  I want to enjoy my life.  Even more than that, I want my life to be meaningful and important in a positive way.

This has led to a discussion between my wife and me about what is important in life.  She says that having fun all the time is not realistic.  I agree.  There are certainly things that everybody has to do in life that they do not want to do.  Work immediately comes to mind.  Here’s the thing.  The fact that you have to work does not necessarily mean that it is more meaningful or important than fun.  For example, if 98% of the lawyers and politicians were not working, the world would be a better place.  Just like fun, if work is not done for the right purpose, it is not a good thing. 

I was just re-reading the book of Ecclesiastes, and was reminded that anything we do without it being for God’s purpose is vanity.  This does not mean that nothing we do matters.  It means that the things we do that affect eternity are the only things that ultimately matter.  As Colossians 3:2 puts it, “Set your mind on things above, not on things on the earth.”   What can we do on earth that affects eternity?  We can lead people to put their faith in Jesus.

Once we know this, the only question left becomes, “What will lead people to put their faith in Jesus?”  There are the obvious answers, like inviting people to church or telling people about Jesus, and those are certainly important, but they are not usually very successful by themselves.  I have often seen people at events holding signs telling people to repent and turn to Jesus and wondered, “Has there ever been anybody who repented and turned to Jesus because of somebody doing that?”  In fact, shouting about God on a street corner is probably counterproductive and turns people off.

So, what does work?  What can help usher in a religious revival in our country that actually causes lasting change?  The answer is not to be pushy.  The answer is to lead by example.  Make people want to have a life like yours.  These four things will get people to want to turn to God.

  1. Be fun.  If you are regularly doing fun things, laughing, and in the middle of exciting moments, people are going to like you more.  People want to spend time with likeable, fun people.  If you are not fun, nobody will want to be around you, much less be like you or take any advice from you.  Fun also puts you in a position to meet people and build relationships with them.
  2. Be good.  There are fun people who are no good.  I know people who are a blast to hang out with but are not good people.  I would never put them in charge of money, because they are shady and the money would be gone.  I would never want to work with them because they are flakey.  I would not want them to date anybody I care about because they would treat them badly.  Being fun is certainly not good by itself.  Think about Pleasure Island in Pinocchio.  The kids are having fun, but are being bad.  This is why I specified that I want my life to be meaningful and important in a positive way.  If you are fun, but also honest, trustworthy, reliable, and helpful, people will respect you. 
  3. Be happy.  Fun and happy are related, but definitely not the same thing.  There are people who do a lot of fun stuff, but are not happy with their lives.  Happy people smile a lot and rarely complain.  Happy people keep things in perspective and remain relatively happy even when things go wrong.  Happy people can feel sad when something terrible happens, but their default position is cheerful.  Fun makes people like you and want to be around you, but happy makes people want to be like you and emulate you.
  4. Let people know that God is the key to your happiness and success.  Once people like you because you are fun, respect you because you are good, and want to be like you because you are happy, you have to make it known that you are that way because you are a Christian.  It is the truth.  I certainly would not be good or happy without God in my life.  In fact, life would be meaningless.  Once they know that God is the key to your happiness, you do not have to be heavy-handed or pushy.  Be ready to answer questions about God, but you do not have to constantly preach at people.  Instead, lead by example.  Continue to be fun, good, and happy.

There is one more thing.  If you are not all of these things, do not tell people you are a Christian.  I relate it to politics.  When I am out wearing a “Make America Great Again” hat, I am a billboard for President Trump, and I want him to win.  I go out of my way to make sure I am smiling and kind to people.  I always try to be that way, but I am even more conscious of it when I am representing President Trump.  I tip better at restaurants if I wear the hat.  I want people to know that the media is lying when they denigrate President Trump and his supporters.  I want them to know that we are good people.  If I am grumpy or rude, it will turn people off.  In fact, I take off the hat when I am driving, because nobody thinks other people are good drivers, even if they are. 

Similarly, if I am not fun, good, or happy, and then I tell people that I am a Christian, I am poorly representing God.  Nobody is going to see a Christian who is unhappy or constantly complaining and say, “How can I be like that?”  I had a friend who would often post on social media about God, but would mostly post complaints about his life or about some girl he was dating.  It drove me crazy because anybody who saw that would think, “That God thing sure isn’t working very well for him.  I’ll figure something else out.”  If you are not fun, good, and happy, work on that before you tell anybody that you are a Christian.

Now, go out and enjoy life.  Having fun may seem frivolous, but it leads to the most meaningful parts of your life. 

Every Path is Not Equal: Harrison Butker’s Wisdom

Say there were two kids.  The first kid was smart, and a voracious reader, who studied hard and listened to his parents.  This kid worked tirelessly to be the best athlete he could be.  He messed up sometimes, but adults generally liked him.  The second kid was equally as smart, but chose not to read or study because he preferred video games.  He often disobeyed his parents.  He was a gifted athlete, but chose to quit the team because he did not like to practice.  He often hung out with troublemakers and spent many days after school in detention.  Which of these kids would you guess will have a more successful, happier life?

This is one of the rare occasions that a conservative and a leftist might agree.  The first kid is far more likely to have a good life.  The reason is obviously that some choices are better than others.  Some priorities are better than others.  Not all paths are equal. 

If somebody stood in front of a group of kids and told them about these two kids, and advised the group that they should choose to be like the first kid, very few people would complain.  Some choices are better than others, and if somebody gives advice to choose the better path, that is a good thing.  Hopefully, kids will listen. 

This is exactly what Super Bowl hero Harrison Butker did on May 11.  The kicker for the world champion Kansas City Chiefs gave the commencement address at Benedictine College, a small Catholic school in Kansas.  Unfortunately, the reaction has been less supportive.  The speech, which you can watch here, was pilloried by the secular media.  The NFL issued a statement saying that “his views are not those of the NFL as an organization.”  There are even calls for Butker to lose his job, including a petition signed by over 136,000 people calling for the Chiefs to kick him off the team.

Did he say something immoral and dangerous, like that boys can be girls or girls can be boys?  Did he defend communism?  Did he condemn Israel?  No.  Had he done any of those things he would have been applauded by the media.  He did say a number of things that are obviously true.  He spent most of the address telling Catholics to be bold in their faith and admonishing priests not to get comfortable with the depravity of our world and to speak out against what is wrong instead of trying to fit in.  He spoke about how many priests abandoned their flocks and went along with the tyrannical lockdowns of churches instead of fighting back.  He spoke out against people who claim to be Catholics, yet take positions on issues that are diametrically opposed to what the Bible says, calling out President Biden specifically.

Then, he got into the part of the speech that has gotten the biggest backlash.  He said that many of the women there were most excited about their marriage and the children they would bring into the world.  He talked about a “diabolical lie” that is prevalent in our culture today.  The lie he alluded to is that women are told that more fulfillment comes from having a successful career than from being a good wife and mother.  He was correctly warning that this lie is harming women, and our country.  He was giving advice.  Godly advice.  Just like the kid who chose to be studious and good, versus the kid who did not, one path is better than the other.

It is difficult to understand why anybody falls for this lie.  Work is not something to be envied.  God literally cursed the ground to make work miserable!  If you look all the way back to the beginning, when Adam and Eve sinned and ate the forbidden fruit, God cursed both of them.  The curse he put on women is that they would have pain in childbirth.  Then He cursed Adam in Genesis 3:17-19.

17 Then to Adam He said, “Because you have heeded the voice of your wife, and have eaten from the tree of which I commanded you, saying, ‘You shall not eat of it’:

“Cursed is the ground for your sake;
In toil you shall eat of it
All the days of your life.
18 Both thorns and thistles it shall bring forth for you,
And you shall eat the herb of the field.
19 In the sweat of your face you shall eat bread
Till you return to the ground,
For out of it you were taken;
For dust you are,
And to dust you shall return.”

In other words, God’s curse to men was that they would be forced to toil and work cursed ground just to eat, until they eventually die.  Now, our culture does something that my dad used to pull with me.  He would tell me to drink the milk from my cereal.  I hated milk, so I would say, “Why do I have to?”  Dad would reply, “You don’t have to.  You get to.”  Our culture now tells women, “Why should men get to go work and you have to take care of the kids?”  They reverse the “get to” and the “have to.”  The difference is, I didn’t fall for it with the milk.  Many women have with the work.  They want the “privilege” of taking on the curse that God put on men.  It is the equivalent of men wishing that they could have pain during childbirth. 

Conversely, children are the opposite of a curse.  Psalms 127:3-5 says: “Behold, children are a heritage from the Lord, The fruit of the womb is a reward.  Like arrows in the hand of a warrior, So are the children of one’s youth. Happy is the man who has his quiver full of them; They shall not be ashamed, But shall speak with their enemies in the gate.”  Children are a reward from God! 

Harrison Butker advised women not to fall for this trick like they fell for the serpent’s trick in the Garden of Eden.  He never said that women are incapable of working outside the home.  He never even said that they should not work outside the home.  He was simply advising that one path is more important and more fulfilling than the other.  It seems obvious that raising good kids would be more fulfilling, and more fun, than working.  It certainly seems obvious that it is more important.  Would I have preferred that my mom was a highly paid CEO instead of staying home and raising me and my two sisters?  Definitely not!  My guess is that very few women who chose kids over career regret it.

I will admit that this path is not for every woman.  Butker was speaking in a religious setting.  I will be the first to say, if you are not a religious person, and especially if you are not married, you should not have children.  Some women lack the godly wisdom to be wives and mothers.  I encourage them to take the career path.  Anybody can do that.  It takes a much more exceptional woman to be a good wife and mother.

Some have complained that he should not have singled out women and wondered why he did not also call out the men in the audience.  Those critics likely did not even listen to the speech and are judging based on media reports, because Butker did, in fact, spend the next section of the speech talking to the men, and blaming many of societies ills on the absence of strong men in the home.  I urge you to listen to the whole speech.

While a lot of crazies are attacking Harrison Butker, the news isn’t all bad.  Many people have come out in his defense, including the wife and daughter of the Chief’s owner, their coach Andy Reid, and many teammates.  His jersey is now a top seller.  More importantly, his good advice is now being talked about.  Hopefully, many men and women alike will take it and choose the better path.  It will make them happier and more fulfilled, and make the world a better place.