Tag: family

Every Path is Not Equal: Harrison Butker’s Wisdom

Say there were two kids.  The first kid was smart, and a voracious reader, who studied hard and listened to his parents.  This kid worked tirelessly to be the best athlete he could be.  He messed up sometimes, but adults generally liked him.  The second kid was equally as smart, but chose not to read or study because he preferred video games.  He often disobeyed his parents.  He was a gifted athlete, but chose to quit the team because he did not like to practice.  He often hung out with troublemakers and spent many days after school in detention.  Which of these kids would you guess will have a more successful, happier life?

This is one of the rare occasions that a conservative and a leftist might agree.  The first kid is far more likely to have a good life.  The reason is obviously that some choices are better than others.  Some priorities are better than others.  Not all paths are equal. 

If somebody stood in front of a group of kids and told them about these two kids, and advised the group that they should choose to be like the first kid, very few people would complain.  Some choices are better than others, and if somebody gives advice to choose the better path, that is a good thing.  Hopefully, kids will listen. 

This is exactly what Super Bowl hero Harrison Butker did on May 11.  The kicker for the world champion Kansas City Chiefs gave the commencement address at Benedictine College, a small Catholic school in Kansas.  Unfortunately, the reaction has been less supportive.  The speech, which you can watch here, was pilloried by the secular media.  The NFL issued a statement saying that “his views are not those of the NFL as an organization.”  There are even calls for Butker to lose his job, including a petition signed by over 136,000 people calling for the Chiefs to kick him off the team.

Did he say something immoral and dangerous, like that boys can be girls or girls can be boys?  Did he defend communism?  Did he condemn Israel?  No.  Had he done any of those things he would have been applauded by the media.  He did say a number of things that are obviously true.  He spent most of the address telling Catholics to be bold in their faith and admonishing priests not to get comfortable with the depravity of our world and to speak out against what is wrong instead of trying to fit in.  He spoke about how many priests abandoned their flocks and went along with the tyrannical lockdowns of churches instead of fighting back.  He spoke out against people who claim to be Catholics, yet take positions on issues that are diametrically opposed to what the Bible says, calling out President Biden specifically.

Then, he got into the part of the speech that has gotten the biggest backlash.  He said that many of the women there were most excited about their marriage and the children they would bring into the world.  He talked about a “diabolical lie” that is prevalent in our culture today.  The lie he alluded to is that women are told that more fulfillment comes from having a successful career than from being a good wife and mother.  He was correctly warning that this lie is harming women, and our country.  He was giving advice.  Godly advice.  Just like the kid who chose to be studious and good, versus the kid who did not, one path is better than the other.

It is difficult to understand why anybody falls for this lie.  Work is not something to be envied.  God literally cursed the ground to make work miserable!  If you look all the way back to the beginning, when Adam and Eve sinned and ate the forbidden fruit, God cursed both of them.  The curse he put on women is that they would have pain in childbirth.  Then He cursed Adam in Genesis 3:17-19.

17 Then to Adam He said, “Because you have heeded the voice of your wife, and have eaten from the tree of which I commanded you, saying, ‘You shall not eat of it’:

“Cursed is the ground for your sake;
In toil you shall eat of it
All the days of your life.
18 Both thorns and thistles it shall bring forth for you,
And you shall eat the herb of the field.
19 In the sweat of your face you shall eat bread
Till you return to the ground,
For out of it you were taken;
For dust you are,
And to dust you shall return.”

In other words, God’s curse to men was that they would be forced to toil and work cursed ground just to eat, until they eventually die.  Now, our culture does something that my dad used to pull with me.  He would tell me to drink the milk from my cereal.  I hated milk, so I would say, “Why do I have to?”  Dad would reply, “You don’t have to.  You get to.”  Our culture now tells women, “Why should men get to go work and you have to take care of the kids?”  They reverse the “get to” and the “have to.”  The difference is, I didn’t fall for it with the milk.  Many women have with the work.  They want the “privilege” of taking on the curse that God put on men.  It is the equivalent of men wishing that they could have pain during childbirth. 

Conversely, children are the opposite of a curse.  Psalms 127:3-5 says: “Behold, children are a heritage from the Lord, The fruit of the womb is a reward.  Like arrows in the hand of a warrior, So are the children of one’s youth. Happy is the man who has his quiver full of them; They shall not be ashamed, But shall speak with their enemies in the gate.”  Children are a reward from God! 

Harrison Butker advised women not to fall for this trick like they fell for the serpent’s trick in the Garden of Eden.  He never said that women are incapable of working outside the home.  He never even said that they should not work outside the home.  He was simply advising that one path is more important and more fulfilling than the other.  It seems obvious that raising good kids would be more fulfilling, and more fun, than working.  It certainly seems obvious that it is more important.  Would I have preferred that my mom was a highly paid CEO instead of staying home and raising me and my two sisters?  Definitely not!  My guess is that very few women who chose kids over career regret it.

I will admit that this path is not for every woman.  Butker was speaking in a religious setting.  I will be the first to say, if you are not a religious person, and especially if you are not married, you should not have children.  Some women lack the godly wisdom to be wives and mothers.  I encourage them to take the career path.  Anybody can do that.  It takes a much more exceptional woman to be a good wife and mother.

Some have complained that he should not have singled out women and wondered why he did not also call out the men in the audience.  Those critics likely did not even listen to the speech and are judging based on media reports, because Butker did, in fact, spend the next section of the speech talking to the men, and blaming many of societies ills on the absence of strong men in the home.  I urge you to listen to the whole speech.

While a lot of crazies are attacking Harrison Butker, the news isn’t all bad.  Many people have come out in his defense, including the wife and daughter of the Chief’s owner, their coach Andy Reid, and many teammates.  His jersey is now a top seller.  More importantly, his good advice is now being talked about.  Hopefully, many men and women alike will take it and choose the better path.  It will make them happier and more fulfilled, and make the world a better place.

Taylor Swift:  A Concert Experience

My wife and I have won “aunt and uncle of the year.”  For Christmas last year, we got my three nieces, who live in North Carolina, tickets for the Taylor Swift Eras Tour at Sofi Stadium in Los Angeles with us.  We also took my two sisters.  My oldest niece is 15-years old and a huge Swiftie.  She has seen Taylor Swift twice before and knows all of the inside information that Swifties know.  My other two nieces, who are 12 and 9, are Swifties in training.  As the concert was about to begin, my oldest niece told me that it was going to be more than just a concert.  It was going to be an “experience.”  She was right.

Taylor Swift put on a concert like no other concert I have ever attended, and I am not an amateur concertgoer.  Just in the past year, I have been to two other big concerts at Sofi Stadium; Paul McCartney and Billy Joel, as well as seeing Styx, Cheap Trick, 3 Doors Down, The Doobie Brothers (in Phoenix), Rod Stewart (in Las Vegas), Sting (in Las Vegas), and The Cure (in England).  Here are some of the things that make Taylor Swift stand out.

The Bracelets – The experience actually starts way before the concert.  In one of Taylor’s songs, there is a line about making friendship bracelets.  Her fans took the line as a call to action, and now they make friendship bracelets to wear and trade at her concerts.  My wife and I had heard about the phenomenon, so we bought some bead kits from the local craft store, and when my nieces arrived, we had a bracelet-making party at Grandma’s house.  We listened to Taylor Swift music while we made bracelets that spell out album names, song lyrics, or other Taylor-related tidbits.  When we arrived at the concert, everyone had them.  My wife’s biggest takeaway from the concert was that everyone was so open and friendly.  Nobody was shy, which I love.  From the moment we arrived, complete strangers were walking from person to person trading bracelets, having conversations, and making new friends.  Even celebrities have been spotted participating.  This seemed to be my youngest niece’s favorite part, because we could barely drag her away from trading bracelets to leave at the end of the night.

The Clothing – My wife asked me what to wear to the concert and my response was, “it’s not the theatre, it’s a concert.  I would guess people just dress casually.”  Then, I asked my oldest niece.  I was wrong.  She said a lot of the people dress in outfits from Taylor Swift album covers or performances.  She had already picked out a very sparkly dress that looked kind of like a disco ball, along with disco ball earrings.  When we got to the show, there were thousands more sparkly dresses, along with ringmaster outfits, elegant flowy gowns, and other elaborate getups that I don’t even know how to describe.  My mom dropped us off and picked us up from the stadium because parking was over $200, and she said it was worth the drive just to see all of the outfits.  Then there was the number “13” written on most of the girl’s hands.  That is, as you might guess, because 13 is Taylor’s lucky number. 

The Technology – After seeing the Taylor Swift Eras Tour, I was left pondering if there was ever a show in the past that was even close to comparable visually.  The best comparison that I could think of was KISS, who was famous for elaborate outfits, crazy makeup, and breathtaking pyrotechnics.  Technology from the past could not compete with what they were able to do for Taylor Swift.  There was a huge video screen on the back of the stage.  Since the Eras Tour was over 3 hours long, covering her 17-year career, the videos and images on the massive backdrop denoted which “era” of her career she was on. 

The gigantic stage went out into the crowd about 80 yards for Taylor to dance and sing down with her backup dancers.  It had hydraulic platforms that would lift her up from the stage at different times during the show, as well as trap doors that she could drop down into between songs for costume changes. (She probably changed costumes more than 10 times.)  It was also a video stage, which allowed for cool effects like snakes striking at dancers, bicyclists leaving tracks around the stage, and one point where Taylor Swift dives into a trap door and appears to swim from the front end of the stage all the way to the back.

Finally, the coup de gras.  I remember when I first started going to concerts and a ballad would come on, and people in the crowd would hold up a lighter.  Then a few years later, when they became more common, people started to hold up their glowing cellphone screens.  At the Taylor Swift Eras Tour, as you walk into the stadium, you are handed a wristband.  This wristband has a geolocator inside that knows exactly where in the stadium you are.  Then it lights up and flashes different colors depending on where you are standing.  This allows for some amazing effects.  They can flash with the beat of the music.  They can create waves of light or colors, almost like when people do the wave at a sporting event.  They can also make patterns of light in the crowd.  For example, at one point there are hearts made of light on either side of the crowd.  It was astonishing.

The Music – It is, of course, a concert, so the music is what matters the most.  Now, if you have read some of my other articles where I talk about values, politics, and religion, you may think I am exaggerating when I say this, but I am about to say the most controversial thing I have written yet.  Taylor Swift has songwriting chops in the same league as Lennon and McCartney.  As a huge Beatles fan, that is almost blasphemous to say, but she really is a brilliant songwriter.  Just like Lennon and McCartney were able to churn out catchy hit after catchy hit in the 1960s, Taylor Swift is already able to play an over three-hour concert with songs that people sing along with, and most of them you would recognize even if you are a little older than her target audience.  Not only that, but she is still in her songwriting prime, so I am sure there are more chart-toppers to come. 

Speaking of singing along, before going to her last Taylor Swift concert, my oldest niece wanted to be surprised by the setlist, so she didn’t look it up.  She did, however, want to be able to sing along with anything Taylor played, so she looked up and learned the lyrics to all her songs!  Apparently, that is not uncommon.  At one point, Taylor Swift asked the crowd if anybody did any lyric memorization for the show, and there was a thundering response.

The Excitement – The excitement is palpable.  I had only ever seen anything like it in old film of the Beatles.  There were a group of girls sitting near us who were literally sobbing through most of the show.  People (including men) were screaming “Taylor!” at the top of their lungs.  At one point in the show, she finishes a song on the piano and looks up into the crowd and lets everyone go crazy.  It was possibly the loudest I had heard a crowd since being at the Kirk Gibson game at Dodger Stadium.  My niece looked over at me and said, “Last time this ovation lasted 8 minutes before she started again.”  After 8 minutes this time, the ovation was still going for another minute or two, and might have continued longer had Taylor not started talking.  It certainly was an experience I will never forget.